GARBAGE

 
 
 
Garbage
GARBAGE

Lilou & John are debating garbage disposal | Lilou explains why she dislikes upcykling and poseurs | John hints that Singapore might have the solution.

John: Time for a serious issue. Should garbage be burned or should we just toss it into the rivers like they do in some countries?

Lilou: What a silly question. Haven’t you seen Karl Pilkington in India. He spent hours on the toilet after swimming in the Ganges.

John: Did he?

Lilou: Yes he did. He said he came, he saw and he shite.

John: I think “shat” is the past tense.

Lilou: [Tomaitos], [tomaatos].

John: So you say we burn the garbage? Or should we “upcycle” it?

Lilou: I hate the word “upcycle”, I say it’s a word for retards who make ugly stuff.

John: So you don’t wanna upcycle stepmom’s old knickers into a nice scarf?

Lilou: Yuck.

John: Do you remember from Jackass when they upcycled their pubic hair into a beard for their friend?

Lilou: Yeah, freshly cut with crabs and everything in it, I laughed for half an hour when I saw it. He wasn’t amused though.

John: If I had been sarcastic I could have said “didn’t he wanna save the planet or what?”

Lilou: More like save the crabs and put them on display.

John: But seriously. The environment matters. I want fresh air, green parks, blue seas and lots of fish in the ocean. I just don’t like poseurs.

Lilou: Yeah to me it’s so obvious that one shouldn’t have to say it. Moral wanking is for people with low self esteem.

John: I think they are part of the problem, not part of the solution. Their morality is too much for people and they don’t want to hear another word about pollution again. Couldn’t we just do like in Singapore? You throw a chewing gum in the street and they cut you up in four parts and send you into orbit around Pluto?

Lilou: You really should become a politician dear. I think you’re really onto something.

 

Lilou & John are debating garbage disposal | Lilou explains why she dislikes upcykling and poseurs | John hints that Singapore might have the solution.

John: Time for a serious issue. Should garbage be burned or should we just toss it into the rivers like they do in some countries?

Lilou: What a silly question. Haven’t you seen Karl Pilkington in India. He spent hours on the toilet after swimming in the Ganges.

John: Did he?

Lilou: Yes he did. He said he came, he saw and he shite.

John: I think “shat” is the past tense.

Lilou: [Tomaitos], [tomaatos].

John: So you say we burn the garbage? Or should we “upcycle” it?

Lilou: I hate the word “upcycle”, I say it’s a word for retards who make ugly stuff.

John: So you don’t wanna upcycle stepmom’s old knickers into a nice scarf?

Lilou: Yuck.

John: Do you remember from Jackass when they upcycled their pubic hair into a beard for their friend?

Lilou: Yeah, freshly cut with crabs and everything in it, I laughed for half an hour when I saw it. He wasn’t amused though.

John: If I had been sarcastic I could have said “didn’t he wanna save the planet or what?”

Lilou: More like save the crabs and put them on display.

John: But seriously. The environment matters. I want fresh air, green parks, blue seas and lots of fish in the ocean. I just don’t like poseurs.

Lilou: Yeah to me it’s so obvious that one shouldn’t have to say it. Moral wanking is for people with low self esteem.

John: I think they are part of the problem, not part of the solution. Their morality is too much for people and they don’t want to hear another word about pollution again. Couldn’t we just do like in Singapore? You throw a chewing gum in the street and they cut you up in four parts and send you into orbit around Pluto?

Lilou: You really should become a politician dear. I think you’re really onto something.

 
Categories: YAP